Zach Uram's Blog

Christ was born
On a holy night
His countenance
Shone bright

He is the eternal Logos
Second Person of the Trinity
He suffered and died
So man would be free

Free from Satan’s schemes
And the power of sin
The sinless Christ was
A true propitiation

Once regenerated
The Image of God is restored
Thanks to the atonement
Of Christ the Lord

I thank God
For His sovereign grace
It alone
Can save the human race

At Calvary Christ paid
The ultimate price
We are saved
From every vice

He ascended to Heaven
Christ will return
Those souls not in Him
In Hell they shall burn

by Zachary Uram
(C) 2025

Transubstantiation
It is erroneous, you see
Christ is sacrificed perpetually
It’s spiritual food only

Purgatory is
A deadly fiction completely
When we die, we go to
Heaven or hell immediately

It has sent billions to Hell
Baptismal regeneration
Infant baptism is false
It is an abomination

Millions perished due to
The Inquisition
A cruel and evil thing
It was a Satanic invention

The Catholic sacraments
Have no power to save a soul
Only those who are born again
Can escape Sheol

The virgin Mary conceived
After the Holy Spirit overshadowed her
After His birth, Joseph and Mary had
Other children, this much is clear

The Catholic so-called
Infallible magisterium
It is utterly false; they have no authority
It’s an exercise in delirium

I won’t attend
A Catholic mass
It is something
I will pass

We should confess directly to God
Confession to a priest
It is not found in Scripture
I like this the least

The pope is in no way
The vicar of Christ, you see
Many popes were wicked
It’s documented history

Mary was not immaculate
She was a sinner indeed
She needed her Son Christ
To be freed

Mary was not assumed
Into heaven at all
She is buried under a church
She was mortal

by Zachary Uram
(C) 2025

I smack it fast
I smack it slow
Smacking my belly
Is the way to go

I smack my belly
Hot and cold
Smacking it
Never grows old

I smack it at night
I smack it in the day
Smacking my belly
Makes me feel gay

I smack my belly lightly
And smack it strong
Smacking my belly
Is never wrong

I smack it
At Christmas, you see
Smacking my belly
Makes me feel free

I smack it
While I watch TV
Smacking my belly
Fills me with glee

I smack it during the summer
And winter too
Smaking it is something
I’ll never eschew

I dream of smacking it
While I sleep
If I can’t smack it
I’ll weep

I’ll smack it today
I’ll smack it tomorrow
If I don’t smack it
I’ll be full of sorrow

I love smacking my belly
I smack it with perfection
I will smack it forever
Smacking it is my obsession

by Zachary Uram
(C) 2025

Please listen
To my sad tale
I lie in bed all day
Like a beached whale

Often I feel blue
I have major depression
Energy I lack
It’s a tough situation

I have no motivation
I feel sad a lot
It seems my mind
Is in a knot

I may bark
Like a dog
Or squeal
Like a big hog

I will bray
Like a jackass
I won’t attend
A Catholic mass

I am as Reformed
As one can be
The Holy Spirit revealed
Every doctrinal mystery

I will flap my arms
And fly like a bird
Don’t think
That I’m absurd

I smack my gargantuan gut
During the day and night
Smacking it is
Always a delight

by Zachary Uram
(C) 2025

I am
An exalted being
Reality is much more
Than what you’re seeing

I have
Mastered time
My travels are
So sublime

I receive
Visions
God equipped me
With provisions

Some people
Call me crazy
My cognition
Is rather hazy

My dear sister Vi
Is a frisky pup
Tonight
She shall sup

I cut
Many a hot toot
They destroyed
Beirut

My behemoth belly
I love to smack
It is rotund
Fullness it doesn’t lack

by Zachary Uram
(C) 2025

I thank God
For His redeeming grace
It alone can save
The human race

God is sovereign
Absolutely
He chooses which men
Will be set free

Jesus is the Son of God
He lived a life free of sin
At Calvary, He was
Our propitiation

Jesus was
A perfect sacrifice
For our sins, He did atone
He paid the price

For six hours
On the cross, Jesus hung
All of our sin was imputed to Him
His praises will forever be sung

For God’s good pleasure
He chose the Elect
It is God, and not man
Who does select

The natural man
Is spiritually dead
Once regenerated
Eternity with Christ lies ahead

by Zachary Uram
(C) 2025

Under the mistletoe
I saw Mommy and Daddy kiss
It was true love
And pure bliss

Gramma cooked
The baked ham
It tasted
Even better than lamb

She also made
Fresh kielbasa so yummy
We devoured it
We had a happy belly

Daddy and us kids
Drove out near the airport
We bought a Christmas tree
The best one we caught

We decorated our front door
With a wreath made of holly
We had the Christmas spirit
We were quite jolly

We had a white Christmas
How beautiful is the snow
We drove around and saw
All the Christmas lights aglow

My dear sister Vi and I
Went on a sleigh ride
I was happy she was
By my side

At home, we listened
To Christmas songs
Jesus came to earth
To right the wrongs

by Zachary Uram
(C) 2025

I’m totally depressed today
My mind is full of dismay

I’m down in the dumps
Slowly, my heart pumps

I have no motivation
I suffer from major depression

I long to be free
From this mental misery

I have profound sadness
I’d rather have happiness

I lie in bed all day
Like a beached whale, I say

My medication helps me a bit
I follow Holy Writ

by Zachary Uram
(C) 2025

Rejoice brethren
And have mirth
Jesus came to save
The sons of earth

He came as
A helpless baby
Our precious Redeemer
Christ is so mighty

And He shall purify
In Christ, we are victorious
By His Blood we are saved
Sin no longer destroys us

Because of Christ’s atonement
Man can be free
Salvation is available
For many people and me

We shall be with Christ
Now and forever
Our faith doesn’t depend
Behold His splendor

In Christ’s first advent
He came as the Lamb
At His second coming
He will be the mighty Ram

by Zachary Uram
(C) 2025

In the Fall
Communion was lost
With God, you see
We were mired
In total depravity

We lost the Imago Dei
Once saved, our relationship
With God is restored
Through sovereign grace
From Christ the Lord

On a cold December
In a manger in Bethlehem
In the early morn
Emmanuel our Savior
Was born

Christmas is a magical
Time of the year
Have a joyous Noel
Jesus is
The King of Israel

The magi came following
The Christmas star
It drew them nigh
Once they arrived
It was Jesus they did spy

Christ was crucified
At Calvary
Where He bled
He said, “It is finished.”
And then He was dead

The grave couldn’t hold Him
On the third day
Christ was resurrected
He defeated death and sin
So man can be regenerated

Christ is coming back
We’ll spend an eternity
With Jesus, in the New
Heaven and New Earth
All sin we will eschew

by Zachary Uram
(C) 2025